My friend Amy owns a gym. From time to time she needs a release -a place to rant. She has found her sounding board here. She has entertained us with the antics of her gym several times.
We learned about oompa loompas and lizard people here.
How hard it can be to put up with the women who work out here.
How idiotic her employees are here.
But today her post on the "Maniac" will be perfect for
Before you start reading - go to the bottom of this post and push Play on the YouTube video... a little background inspirational music - to get you in the mood.... ok, got it going?... now read!!!
So.... without further ado -
To the "Maniac": Here are the things I have really been meaning to say
(I have dubbed her this because she dresses like she stepped out of the Flashdance Movie)
When you complain at least once weekly about how you don't think my morning employee set the resistance dials on the machines correctly, and ask me to get down on my hands and knees to check ALL of them, and like always when they are set properly, with a smile I say "Oh 'Maniac' you're just getting stronger and all the machines are getting easier for you." What I Meant To Say Was "You are the biggest pain in the ass I have ever met and we both know that these machines were set correctly, and no matter how much you wish it even if they weren't it is not going to get you a discount or refund on the already dirt cheap membership dues you have already paid.
When you are breezing by me out the front doors and I smile and say "Have a great day!" What I Meant To Say Is "Why don't you turn your sorry ass around and march it back into the locker room and clean up the freaking pig sty mess we both know you just left. You are a grown ass woman and should know better than to leave used kleenex, spilled makeup and tipped over bottles on the counter. If you had taken two more steps you could have thrown your used towel in the laundry hamper instead of on the floor. And if I ever have to pick up your dirty underwear that you have left on the ground again I may have to hurt you."
When you use our complimentary fitness towels that are meant to wipe the sweat off your brow to instead wipe the sweat out of your butt crack or blow your nose into, when I look at you I say nothing - What I Meant To Say Is "Get the Hell out of here and DO NOT ever come back."
Maybe one day I'll snap and say all those things.
I just have to use these two pictures again: