Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Slap of Reality

Sometimes, there is no way to hide it, fake it, or forget about it. Life just SUCKS!

I cried for the first time last night in a long time. I cried because of disappointment.

My dearest and I were FINALLY after years (like as many years as there have been wee ones around) so anyway after years we get invited to a New Years Eve event. A party!!! I was so excited. I RSVP'ed the day the invite arrived. (Minnesotans are notorious for not RSVPing ever. "I'll either make it or not, I'll know when I arrive") So, again, we got an invite.

I was on a mad search for a sitter - How hard could it be? I had a month and a half! I guess I underestimated the social life of 14 year olds! Ugggghhhhhh Really? What preteen or early teen needs to be going to a party on New Years Eve? What happened to sitting on your bed and listening to the top 100 count down for the year and then watching the ball drop enjoying the extra treats your parents picked up for you out of guilt?

Anyway - so search as we may, even trying girls who have never sat for us, still we had no luck. It wasn't until last night that I lost all hope of some miracle. No sitter, no go. I had a very hard time calling my sweet friend to send my regrets. I fought back tears long enough to make the call, and have to admit that I did the movie cry the rest of the way into town. (tears trickling, no sound, dabbing at the corner of my eyes, heavy breaths)

My husband commented that I should be happy to be around my family today. Yes, I suppose. But, as I told him, I am blessed to be with my family everyday. But it is friends that I miss.

So, here I am. Another New Year with no plans and no hope of any. I could sit back and count my blessings - the fact that I have a family to be with, and that I am alive to see yet another year come and go etc.... But, right now - I just want to say Sometimes Life Really Does Suck.

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