F-U-N, t.v. crew, dancing in the rain!!! Join me with a smile

Today our Public Television station followed me on a photo shoot for my project - This is my town: Bemidji. I took pictures of a gal while they filmed me. It will be featured on their Common Ground show (see link). It will air in June I believe. It was a lot of fun to do.
Then when I got a home a local photographer popped into my Facebook page and said he wanted to take pics in the rain. I told him I wanted to dance in the rain. So..... I am going to dance in the rain while he takes pics! How fun! Absolutely F-U-N! (maybe it will look like this (but I will wear a bra) )
Then I am going to come home and collapse! I am dead tired. A short rest will be in order. I forsee take out tonight......

Happy April Fools Day - Need some ideas?

Last night my husband moved all four kids around to different beds when they were sleeping (and their alarm clocks too) so that when they awoke this morning they found themselves confused. It was good for a giggle and a bit of talk this morning around the breakfast table. What did you do/ have done to you?

These ideas are kinda funny:

OompaLoompas and Lizard People

I own/manage a woman's fitness spa and recently had the opportunity to attend a tanning expo. While I am not an avid tanner, I do sell tanning packages and products at our club and was interested in checking out the new products and possibly winning the grand door prize (a new tanning bed). This was my worst nightmare. I walked in all my Casper (the friendly ghost) like glory into a room of oompah loompahs,

lizard/human mutants and Malibu barbies.

The day started with the opening of the discontinued/overstock room. All sorts of fabulous lotions at shockingly low prices. All of these tanners, men and women alike, jostling each other trying to grab up what they can like a day after Thanksgiving sale. It felt like I had stepped into an awful Sci Fi movie.

The day then moved onto the actual expo part where the vendor booths were set up in one half of a large room which was divided into two rooms with a large curtain. In the other half was the lunch/speaker section of the room. Of course since it was a tanning expo they had free tanning available. It wasn't long before the stench of cooking flesh started filling the air - which was extremely appealing while I was attempting to eat my lunch (which was shared at a table of 2 oompah loompahs, 1 extremely bitchy Malibu barbie, 1 lizard/human mutant and a partridge in a pear tree. Actually no partridge just an older couple who may have wandered into the expo by mistake and were excited snapping up all the free samples they could.

The whole day was an assault to all the senses from the scary sight of the oompah loompahs, the smell of roasting flesh, being bumped and jostled by the lizard/human mutants,

the constant hum of the tanning beds running all day and finally the taste of the bronzing mist from the spray on facial tan I was talked into sampling. I felt slightly like Ross from friends. I stood there waiting for her to spray until I finally ran out of breathe. I opened my mouth to ask if she was going to spray when she pulled the trigger sending a wonderful bronzing mist into my mouth. YUM!

What I meant to say

What I meant to say... oh this is going to be fun.
(you can find out the particulars by clicking on the $5 link above)

To the guy at the post office who couldn't find my "Delivery Confirmation" package
(which is obviously important, and there for the person paid for such a request....)
What I said was:
"That's o.k. it wasn't your fault it was lost. Call me when you find it."
What I meant to say was:
"Find my freakin' package buddy before I grab you by the collar and shake one out of you. NOW!!!!!"

vi.sualize.us

To the lady at Target whose till rebooted right after my cart FULL of stuff was rung up and I was swiping my overly abused debit card ...
What I said was:
"It's not your fault. Let's just do this together and get it over with" as she re-rung every item again.
What I meant to say was:
"I am going to be LATE to pick my son up from pre-school now and I am going to look like a neglectful parent who will get the stink eye from the teacher because your dang computer puttered out." To Target what I should say is "As much money as the world spends at your store (I alone pay the light bill, I swear) you cold buy new computers!!!! 30 YEARS OLD IS TOO OLD!!!


To my friend who is having issues with a couple of her friends.
I said was:
" You need to be above it all and just sit back and let it alone"
What I meant to say is:
" Those ladies are acting like 13 yr old BITCHES and you are better off without them - run girl run! I haven't cared much for either of them ever... However, I have always loved you. Run!!!!!"

vi.sualize.us

When my husband asked where his clean underwear were (since there weren't any in his drawer)
What I said was
" They are downstairs in the small wicker basket right in front of the dryer dear. Can you get them, or should I run down and grab them for you." even though he sat downstairs and watched me fold laundry as we watched tv together the night before and knew I was working on laundry
What I meant to say is:
"F*ck you *sshole, do your own d*mn laundry and you will know exactly where it is." (please note: hubby suggested this one ;)


Oh I best stop here for this week... but, Ahhh yes people, this is going to be fun.
Every Wednesday morning I will be playing along. You too can join the fun.

Due to this change: I will be delaying our Collaborative Photo Project until Wednesday afternoon/evening time.

To:

To My Children: I know you hate school. Everybody hates school. Once you get there I know that you enjoy yourself at least part of the day - but like all things, getting there is the hard part.

To My Hubby: Thank you for saying "You are beautiful" when you woke me yesterday, I smiled thinking about it all day.

To My Family: All I really want for Christmas is what I just ordered: A Nikon D60. So, money to help pay for this purchase REALLY would be appreciated. OR a Nikon D60 for Dummies book. If that is not ok with you, then a girt card to Gander Mt. for clothes will work too.(weird huh? but that is where I buy all my clothes)

To The Preschool: Thank you for taking my four totes of toys for the holiday store. I can not tell you what a relief it is to get rid of all that clutter. Especially when it goes to such a good cause.

vi.sualize.us

To Our Christmas Tree: Don't fall over again. One time a season is all I can handle.

To The Cats: Stay the h#ll out of the Christmas tree. See above.

To Global Warming or Weather Pattern Change or whatever you want to call it: we need snow. My kids tried to make a snow angels and made it turned out to be more of a grass angels.

To The Christmas Spirit: Please come find me. I am finding it harder and harder to conjure up. This is bad because my kids are getting more and more excited as the years pass. (hopefully we will surpass each other and they can start decorating and setting the mood).

To Hannah: You are the best babysitter - I am so excited to have you babysitting this weekend!

To The World: Please level off for me so that I can start doing things like watching movies and reading books again. I miss it, it is my two favorite things to do (beside blogging)

To The Pipeline Workers in Town: I know "y'all" are from Texas, Florida, Georgia, and other deep South states. I know this snow and ice is throwing you and your "big ole" diesel trucks for a loop... but, really move aside and let the rest of us go as you figure out how to drive in these conditions.

To Everyone on FaceBook: I am usually kidding - I wish there was a symbol or sign for sarcasm, that way people would know I was JUST KIDDING.

To Corabela: I received the soaps and am sooooo in love! I can hardly unwrap and use them. They are just too pretty. I will show everyone (that is you) these soaps very very soon (maybe tomorrow if the sun shines so I can take a better pic)

To You Reading: Thanks :)

I will be the Next Playmate

Well, none of you guessed it. When I posted the pic of the amazing Nikon D60....

The truth is :
I have been assigned as the next Playboy Playmate.
You can catch my full page spread in February.

Apparently they are trying to appeal to the desperate dads of the world
and want to feature haggard housewives. Stay tuned ;)

Ok - no MOM, not for real. But man... if they paid enough... hmmmm

no, seriously !! I ordered and hope to receive before the end of the week my very own

NIKON D60!!!!

I have no idea how to use it or what I have gotten myself into - but here is hoping!
Maybe, I could shoot for Playboy? nahhhh....
(they are in CA)

Martha I Ain't

click the pic
(to see how difficult I want
my cooking to be this holiday season)

This time of year brings on a different mind set in people. The transformation is a bit frightening really. How normal people can turn into high stress, recipe hounding, pushing / shoving black Friday shopping, cleaning, decorating, tinsel draping, potato mashing, panicking, credit card maxing, crying messes is beyond me!?

I shouldn't say that - I have been that person in years past. I have been that person with teeny babies to boot. I can't do it anymore, even if my babes are bigger now. It isn't worth it to me.

For years I watched every single episode of Martha Stewart Living. I wanted to be her. I wanted my house to be Martha worthy. I wanted my towels to be perfectly folded and my closets perfectly organized. My holiday preparations led me to the edge of sanity. Hot glueing pine cones and ribbons to the outside of a Christmas gift may have been my breaking point.

Then something amazing happened. I realized that Martha was no better than I was - she was just richer with a production crew and an amazing staff. Then she went to prison .... and I realized I was right.

So. Lately. As the holidays roll around I have taken a step back. Not panicked. Tried to keep things in perspective. Last year I went one step further. I sat back, I didn't say all that much (I know - impossible if you know me), I just observed and enjoyed. It was wonderful.

click the pic

This year I think I will follow Martha's lead though....
and just drink my way through the season.
Maybe if I slip a little something something in to my coffee no one will notice?!

What don't you like about yourself at the Holidays and what do you hope will be different this year?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Notice the mess in the kitchen on the click thru? Yeah - Martha I ain't (lately)

Legs - but whose?

So it seems my new header has stirred up some question as to if those are my legs or not.

They are not my legs. But, I love love love that picture. When I first spotted that picture I had to do a double take because I thought they were my legs. That is how close they are to mine. Plus, I have a white skirt - but my hubby (math guy dock guy) is right - I do not have shoes like those.

So - to clarify, I posted two pics of my legs taken this summer.
Proceed to hate or not.
I hope not.

This pic was part of my summer header.
This all took me back to the '80's and this song.

What I Say The Most

Deb @ Sojourner made a "wordle" for her niece I thought it was way fun so I headed over here to make my own. When I got there I was happy to see that I could make one using my blog. It took the commonly used words and made a fun little ....well... ummm... wordle out of them.

Click to make it bigger.
Than head over there and make your own.
You can even print them.

My Wordle

Be My Guest

Well, actually....
I am a guest contributor today.
At this fabulous blog --->


Oh come on, it is only one little click. It's worth it (I hope).

I'm not sure what time in the morning (Tuesday) the post is going up. So, if it is not up yet, please check back later. (geez I really don't know if it is worth all that energy. I really hope so ;)

AH-HAA!

Click to Enlarge

Enough Said.

Blinders On

Ring, Ring, Ring goes the phone

"Hey, are you mad at me?"

"What?" Confused, "why would I be?"

"I don't know, but I just saw you in Target and you cruised right past me"

"Oh, yeah, well, I shop with blinders on....."

As you know (or some new found friends may not know) I have four kids. Dearest is for the most part working. There for it is to be understood that when I am going anywhere I have four kids with me. Now, as they are growing it is getting better, but I have fallen into the habit of shopping with blinders on. I am focused on the task at hand and where my children are at all times.

I am not a casual, stroll along and listen to the muzac whilst looking at the products around me - no I am the need 6 cans of cream soup and 6 cans of diced tomatoes in this aisle kind of shopping fury . I also expect my children to show the utmost respect and decent behavior in public. That means keeping a close eye on everything they say or do while they are still in the "training" process (don't email me about my choice of words- words are eluding me this week- if you have a better one to insert there then do so!)

My intention when I enter a store is to get what I need and (usually) a little more. Avoid as many impulse buys as possible and get out of there without ripping the heads off any stupid muzac listening shoppers along the way, as I make sure my kids don't embarrass me or break anything (like a jar of tomato juice -ugg!).

So if you see me breeze past you in Target or the grocery store and I don't stop to chat or even wave 'hi' it is not because I am mad at you. I just don't see you (or I may see you and be avoiding you because that would keep me in the store that much longer... shhhh don't tell anyone that part)

The Looming Question

Pssssst... Under here
I'm in this pile of clothes...

Do NOT tell anyone where I am hiding.

I have washed and folded and put away laundry for two days.
I spent the last 3 hours gathering clothes for our trip.
They are all stacked into neat piles on my son's twin bed...
(It takes up the whole bed, and that is just for the kids)
Now, do I put these clothes in
suitcases, laundry baskets, storage tubs?
Uggg the looming questions of packing.
Although I haven't said how long we are going it is more then a few days.

I am off now, sneaking.
Trying to get my work done while avoiding my family whose job it is to serve as a human obstacle course. Picture it - oldest darting at me with a lost toy concern, youngest is hungry (man that boy is always hungry) hubby sneaks up behind wondering if I really need three pairs of sunglasses in the van (what? I do!) Girly is coming in from the left to tell on someone, whoa - almost got tackled by child #3 who is crying about ... who knows what. He always cries!

Alright off to locate 5 more suitcases (my bag is packed - wooo hooo!) and then to negotiate stacks and stacks of clothes into them only to most likely find I will need storage totes or something like a camel with side packs to carry all of the stuff a family of 6 requires to travel cross country and camp along the way.

Actually... now that I think about it - leave mommy alone, she is going to find a drink first!

What does your underwear say about you?

What Does Your Underwear Say About You

G-String, Grannie panties, boy shorts, bikinis, or briefs. What kind of underwear do you wear? What does it say about you? On this boring, mundane Monday I need a good giggle, maybe you do too. So here ya go...

Take the quiz here -
Find out what your underwear says about you at QuizTank.com

Quick - go take the quiz and then come back ... tell me what it says about you.

According to the quiz
Mine say that -


I Am A Carer

I always like to try new things, I like to look for the next big thing. I like to keep things simple but elegant and neat. I like to think back on times I used to feel more sexy. I could do with some pampering.

Did you take the quiz? What did it say about you?
Let me know the results - if you dare ;)

(What kind of underwear do I wear? Wouldn't you like to know. Maybe I already gave you a hint ;)

Who's Going Down?

First - Adam from Throwing Quarters is Blog of Note today! Seriously... how fun. I swear I have the best blog friends! Julie, Julie, Ext., and now Adam all Blog of Note! Congrats.


Girly went to the grandparent's house last week.
She came back with a set of Bratz dolls.
She has a few of these dolls already (all gifts from other's).

This morning as I was drinking my coffee, looking out the window, watching the sun rise I looked down at the magical rays of the sun landing on ---the Bratz doll who was lying ontop of the Barbie and Ken doll.

Seriously - if you don't know what these dolls look like let's see if I can explain: Take Barbie and shrink her by about 2 inches, then add two inche heels (on removable and inter-changable feet) Next hmmm -what? Jack Barbie up. Throw her on the street and force her to become some guys "b*tch" dress her in club/street clothes and then sit on her head until it takes on a Charlie Brown shape (but with fabulous hair). Yeah... I am not much for the Bratz doll!

As this Bratz doll was lying on top of Barbie - as though she had put the smack down on her.... I wondered who would win a fight between the two.

What do you think and why? I know who I am putting my money on - just want to know what you think.

Pushing a Dragon through the Wind

Dragon Boat Races

Tonight I will be on Lake Bemidji pushing a dragon through the wind.

Every summer our town hosts the dragon boat races
(see link above).
This year Dearest and I ended up on a team.
Tonight is the first practice.
The weather is calling for wind gusts up to 16 mph -
On an open lake -rowing- this kind of wind can be an issue.

Maybe I should find a wet suit :)

I will update you more as things progress - the races are this Saturday.

Words To Live By (at least for the long weekend)

Motto To Live By
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving
safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways,
chocolate* in on hand, latte* in the other,
body thoroughly used up,
totally worn out, and screaming,
"WOO HOO, what a ride!"
~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

* Insert various favorable items - wine, food of choice, beer, soda etc.


Also - if you weren't by lately drop down one more post and see the answers to "Ask Jules"....

I Have a Confession

Don't Hate Me,
Please Don't Stop Following,
Just Give Me A Chance To Explain....

I listen to country music.

[on cue Backlights fade, spotlight on - Crowd Gasps]

I know I know I know.

I like all sorts of music and often flip from one type to the next

Classical
Top 40
Bluegrass
Jazz
Classic Rock
and Instrumental
even a little Metal if the mood strikes

But I always end up back at the Country station enjoying country songs. Now I have hinted at this before here and here and I gave it away here. But I have not out right stated... I like Country Music.

In my defense - I must say that most of the "new" country music is quite similar to Pop music of the past. In fact these days, more country songs are actually "cross over" songs then are not. Bon Jovi on the Country station and the Pop, Taylor Swift, and Keith Urban are playing on both sides of the station as well. Heck, if Kid Rock can go country then I can too!

So, take it or leave it. But, if we are going to go
any further in this relationship - you need to know :)

But, hey a lot of country songs have very genuine lyrics, and I don't fear my kids hearing anything "too mature" for their young ears. In fact this is their favorite performance to date :




Of course there are those "standards" that I just can't help belting out (looking a fool) while driving down the road - much to my kid's dismay ;) Although considering that my oldest's favorite song is American Pie by Don McLean this too might be rubbing off.

Freedom, Fun, Fresh Air - Pictures

Yesterday we blew off all responsibilities and headed to the State Park. Here is some pics from our morning.... as you requested:

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~
As we headed down the trail
we were in search of

freedom
fun
fresh air

pic by A. Nelson

Picture taking opportunities abound

pic by A.Nelson

Porcupine
I heard this guy before I saw him.

pic by me

While waiting for my turn to snap pics of the porcupine
I noticed this sweet beauty.
Warming itself in the sunlight.

pic by me

The ice is not quite off from the lake.
Ice doesn't just melt from the lakes,
it sinks,
breaks apart
and

washes up.

pic by me

These ice chunks can be beautiful but dangerous.
As the wind blows and the waves lap these hunks
of ice can push the shoreline into 5 foot heaves of dirt
they can break apart buildings on the shore, and destroy
anything in it's way.

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

I then asked Amy to take some pics of me. Since I am the one who holds the camera most often, I don't really have any pictures of myself.

This is what followed:
Love the mix/match outfit? What was that?

I have been known to have some attitude :)



Ok, now this is getting silly

That one is for you Julie and Sabin

~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~:~

Well, we kissed the park good-byeExhausted from the fun and fresh air
we headed home for a rest,
luckily I made home
before I crashed!

I'm Cheating on You!

Do you remember what it is like to have a new boyfriend? Everything is fun and wonderful and you spend all of your free time with him. Forgetting all about your dear old friends that have been with you all along?(Don't worry - I am not cheating on Dearest) --- Rather on all of you !
I have been spending my time over at our new project Trans Atlantic Learning Adventure. It is a collaboration between my daughter and Julie's daughter from Moment's of Perfect Clarity - for those that are just tuning in. It is like a modern day pen pal inspired by the Flat Stanley project, but way cooler.

So, for today hop over here and find out what these photos are about and see what I am doing over there instead of here with you.... thanks - I promise I won't stray too far from you ;)

Here you were wondering why a simple drawing had to be stretched out for days..... seemed fishy didn't it - trust your instincts right.... [head hung in shame-sorry]